Rich collector blues - am I crazy?

[retroleds]

Recently some insanely wealthy guy(7 figures, maybe 8) stumbled upon my site. Here's the controversial/weird part - I don't want to do any further business with the guy.

He's $**%^) demanding! Nothing is good enough - I think this guy could get the best cut of meat in the house, and still ask the waiter, "you sure there isn't anything better." I think the complaining and repeated asking is strictly reflexive. If I have admitted an item is NOT NOS, and that it has been refurbished, don't make me apologize for not having something better in hand. 39 years old is 39 years old!

Makes a play for me to throw in free items, after we have already agree to price and terms. He totally doesn't seem to appreciate or care(even when I pointed out that free overnight shipping was asking me to take another 5% hit off my already meager profit margin. Or that the "free" items were another hit for me.

The correspondence and conversation seem totally one-sided - pick my brain for responses that might take 3/4 of a page, then never comment on the responses. I can live without a "thanks"(most do, so I'm good), but this guy rarely responds at all - other than fresh questions,repeat. I've even had my wife look at some of the email correspondence and she say, "hey, looks like he is a bit autistic or has Aspergers. Sorry honey, you are almost an inanimate object to him - no point in getting mad." This is probably the real deal killer - anyone who has dealt with me knows I like a little fun, a little human interaction mixed in with the business. I'll listen to your 'chit', IF you are willing to occasionally listen to mine. I'm willing to lose a little time and money on people who will pleasantly break up the monotony of my work day.

The collecting means absolutely nothing to him. He owned virtually each of the Pulsars as they came out(bear in mind he was 12 in '72). I've seen his "collection" - hundreds of Panerias, Rolex, etc. His purchase practices are strictly reflexive. Maybe that is what really bothers me - most of you guys, even those with really large extensive collections, seem to still appreciate the thrill of chasing a rare item, while this guy looks at it as simply services for hire. Uli Sick and I once had a little exchange on this subject, and he bemoaned how the Internet has killed much of the thrill of collecting. He told me how his father would send letters and wait months, sometimes years to get one rare stamp - and now it take little effort to collect. All you need is a credit card and an Internet connection.

Ok, I went long here - I really just want some thoughts(permission) on whether it is crazy for me to want to cut this guy lose. I can live without his money - there MUST be a dollar value to not having to fume over dealing with him.

[horror_logic]

Look like another guy that has lost this soul, wrapped up in an excess of cash he cant take to his grave but is fearfull of losing it to the extent he has to squeeze every last penny out of anyone who crosses his path where there is a financial exchange. Sounds like he can buy anything he likes, so whats the fun in that? none, as he has nothing to look forward to when most people have to save or lets say be carefull when parting with cash for an item that is pehaps not necessary but may be a luxury one treats them selves to once in a while.
He feels the the only control he has is over others by being arrogant or rude and probably also gets a thrill from knocking a few quid off a pruchase for that same reason, after all he doest need the money he is saving on the deal.

I would not get rid of him, just charge him "YOUR" prices and not his, if he is not happy with that he will do the job for you !!!

[richard_uk]

Bruce?

[funkyguy]

cant all be buyers like me out there Ed lol.

err.... wheres that hexagon startos bertone. iam sure your hiding them from me.lol

Funkguy

[retroleds]

I would not get rid of him, just charge him "YOUR" prices and not his, if he is not happy with that he will do the job for you !!!

Doubt that would work at all. Since he is basically retired at 51, he has nothing but time[pieces].

Bruce?

No Richard, it's not Bruce. Bruce is warm and fuzzy comparatively, and Bruce actually STILL gets a kick out of his pieces. Bruce will leave me a message like, "well, call me if you get a chance, thanks." Bruce(IMO) sees himself as a sort of [under-appreciated?] caretaker of the watches and their history. He has actually given back quite a bit back to the collecting genre he is focused on. I can appreciate that, even if it doesn't float my personal 'boat'. As a part-time musician I often play music that I don't totally dig(might just be I played it too many times), but I still get pleasure out of seeing other people enjoying it.

When a guy gets to where it's all "Catch" and no "catch and release", I'm thinking they are just hoarding and making it harder for other people to catch any of that particular joy. You have a right to hoard but I don't think it is good for me as an individual businessperson or for the genre of collecting in the whole. People can't collect what they can't get....please, consider setting free some of your lesser pieces and duplicates for someone new to the scene.

Contrasting scenario: I got an email while typing this from a guy who was apologizing that I had lost a few bucks due to currency fluctuation, and that he was making it up asap. Got to love a guy like that!

[abem]

Ed,

That is an interesting problem. Collecting is a strange activity anyway, since (as eBay makes perfectly obvious) there's always someone out there with deeper pockets than you. If it's just about hoarding as many marbles as possible rather than being a historian / student / caretaker of those marbles, there's not much point or fun in that.

So, how to deal with this deep pocketed horological marble hoarder?

Maybe you can have a little fun with this. A while back, I read a book called the "Emperor of Scent" about a man who became a master perfumer. While he was young and up and coming in his profession, he came upon an obscure but extraordinarily well stocked vintage perfumerie in Paris owned by a difficult old woman. For the average customer, she would tersely offer only the commonest of perfumes. For the discriminating customer, she would show a few exotics, but wouldn't let you buy them. However, if you were a favorite customer, then she walk openly talk and share the good stuff. In this way, she created demand for her rare and difficult to obtain merchandise. The author ended up spending months and months courting the proprietor, sending her roses, and winning her over before she would allow him into the inner circle.

The problem is that money makes for an unequal playing field. People with money almost always think that the world will chase after them (and generally that is exactly what happens). See if you can turn the tables. Make him chase after you for a change - in the end perhaps he'll respect you more and not treat you like such a doormat. You could say to him something to the effect of , "Well, I'd be reluctant to sell that piece to just anybody, but I'd consider it if you could write me 1000 words on why it's significant and why you want it for your collection." Make him work for it. In the worst case, he'll go away.

-abe.

[retroleds]

Abem:
I am laughing tears of joy! That really was the best advice.


The very courteous guy I mentioned above, who was concerned about the small loss I suffered due to exchange fluctuation - he had just bought my solid gold calc., at fairly close to my asking price! And still, courteous to the end, not like I am some lackey. He always gives a personable greeting like, "hope you are well, it's been a while". Number of others that come here that I really consider top notch in that regard.

[LEDluvr]

abem wrote:

You could say to him something to the effect of , "Well, I'd be reluctant to sell that piece to just anybody, but I'd consider it if you could write me 1000 words on why it's significant and why you want it for your collection." Make him work for it. In the worst case, he'll go away.

LOL! That is greaw advice. Judging from Ed's description of this nasty collector/hoarder he is more likely to write a 100 word response, heavily salted with explicatives. But I think the outcome will be the same.. he'll leave Ed be and go on to make someone else more miserable.

[retroleds]

LOL! That is greaw advice. Judging from Ed's description of this nasty collector/hoarder he is more likely to write a 100 word response, heavily salted with explicatives. But I think the outcome will be the same.. he'll leave Ed be and go on to make someone else more miserable.

This guy isn't nasty - he actually tries to butter me up in 20 second burst, then it's back to wheedling. It only comes up maybe once out of a few hundred people but I always have the same revulsion to being placed in a position where I essentially have to apologize for what I have for sale.

Where I started really seeing the light: Guy buys a refurbished Date II off me - calls me and says he thought it would be totally mint(the ad on my site is clear - lightly used case, rebrushed to nice, new glass, clean,new gasket,etc. I tell him to send it back, I will refund all, including his return shipping so he isn't holding something he doesn't like, "no,no, I want to buy another piece of you, why don't you just give me a discount on this next one." I could see him trying to get me to apologize for the NOS Sport(purchase #2) and give him a discount on #3?

He received his watch today. I haven't heard from him.

[bucko170]

Add a 10% premium to the price and then offer him a 5% discount

Nothing wrong with a nicely rebrushed case, especially when it has been declared in the description in the first place, a rebrushed case wouldn't put me off making a purchase.

[rewolf]

Sthe are also people that just PRETEND to have deep pockets, and always have to find a flaw to have an excuse why they finally don't make the deal because they can't admit they couldn't afford it...

[retroleds]

cant all be buyers like me out there Ed lol.

err.... wheres that hexagon startos bertone. iam sure your hiding them from me.lol

Funkguy

Come on, you got this one from me (thanks again for the trade, I think that worked nicely for both of us).


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....and baby you can drive my car, and yes I'm going to be a star....

[LEDluvr]

Add a 10% premium to the price and then offer him a 5% discount

There you go Ed! Mick is right - just do what the department stores do to us all when they have a "sale". I see what you are saying now Ed, basically the guy is trying to make you feel bad for selling him an "inferior" item, and "that's ok" IF you make it up to him by giving him a discount on the next purchase.
He's trying to get a deal and this is the best way he thinks he can get it.
If you follow Mick's advice you both will get a deal... and you'll still come out 5% ahead.

[funkyguy]

cant all be buyers like me out there Ed lol.

err.... wheres that hexagon startos bertone. iam sure your hiding them from me.lol

Funkguy

Come on, you got this one from me (thanks again for the trade, I think that worked nicely for both of us).
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yes true enough Ed.lol

But on a serious note regarding doing business in general,
your attitude and care and fair mindedness is a credit to you Ed,
ive traded with you on a few ocassions now and its always been a positive experience. if there were more traders/dealers like yourself out there this whole collecting malarky would be a dam whole lot more less stressful.

FG

[Huertecilla]

´Rich collector blues - am I crazy?´

Euhmmmm, since you are a vintage electronic digital watch enthusiast you áre a bit east of ´normal´.

´Normal´ is however only so because the bulk of a clock diagram representing specific human behaviour/properties is considered ´norm´.

However; in several societies obesity is the norm but that does not make it héalthy.

Ditto crazy or not

After all mechanical worshipping is the norm in Wis-dom so go figure

[retroleds]

Some of this was a social experiment - I wanted to see:
a) how many of you would say "no price is high enough to be treated like an inferior species.
b)how many would say, "swallow the crap, but charge him through the nose."
c)If he would read the thread and go away.

Results(in my opinion).
A & B are really a matter of how badly it will hurt(financially) to NOT do business with them. Guess the pain is not enough for me to want to keep him. As I've gotten older I've tried very hard to have a plan B and a plan C....so I don't have to grab my ankles too often if plan A fails. I'm getting too old for getting shoved abruptly over a barrel....I have to be bent and stretched slowly(a few kind words in the ear helps too).
c) The silence is f'n GOLDEN Sad but true. Ironically, it seemed that every customer who contacted me yesterday was just the nicest. In an honest, reasonable way.

I think this thread is about played out... we all have had to deal with people with the mistaken idea that they had to ability to steer you around, just because they have money to wave in your face. Not considering that you are not for sale - only the merchandise. Thanks for lending an ear fellas.